Tuesday, July 31, 2007

Melancholy

Melancholy---a feeling of thoughtful sadness.
I put the word melancholy down before I looked up the definition, and the word fits my feelings today. I don't know why. Probably a combination of many things. Stress which I fight all the time.
I never knew I was a nervous person until I realized I was talking on the phone and walking in circles (when the phones were actually attached to the wall). I had a long curly cord on the phone, and I was walking in circles like a horse tied to one of those rotating things they have in pastures for exercising. I sat down in wonderment but before I realized it, I was circling again.
I am also a little sad. About hubby's job. He is working but I don't know how long. And now he is talking about having his carpal tunnel surgery while the work is so up in the air.
Also there will probably be no outing tomorrow. The lady who started the outings is on vacation for 3 weeks in Italy with another artist. They will be painting or sketching their way around. Most everyone else had appts or plans they couldn't break.
And last but not least, I have been ignoring my spiritual side. Since Bible study finished in April, I have been negligent about going to church, reading the Bible, and doing my prayers. We did make it to church on Sunday and that was nice.
Being in this mood has made me get emotional and that is when the poetry comes out. I am a born worrier. I will worry something to death. I finally started a worry box when I last had a full time job. Every time I worried, I wrote the problem down, and turned it over to God to handle. After a couple months none of them were important any more or they had been solved. But in the last few months, I have become lax and am worrying again. Here is the poem about worry that I wrote today:
Needy
In times of need, we tend to think
We can rely on our own instinct.

I faced a problem with worry and despair
I saw no end, no way to repair
Fretting, fussing, sitting with blank stare
Thru it all, my Lord waited there.

Sometimes in life things get lost
You finally give up thinking it’s been tossed
An idea pops up, “a prayer I’ll post”
Object found, with help from the Most.

God is there waiting for you and me
His love for the asking, look and you’ll see.

Turn to Him first and save all the worry
For God your Father deserves all the glory.

7-30-07

4 comments:

Dancing-Light-Studio said...

Hi Jeanne, Thank you very much for your comments on my artwork. Lots of people look but they seldom take time to leave a note. I can feel your sadness today and I said a prayer for you and your family. Grace and Peace to you and yours. Nora

Jo Castillo said...

Jeanne, beautiful poem. You are thinking in the right direction. Wishing you the best.

Jo

"JeanneG" said...

Thank you both. I appreciate the prayers.

Joan said...

Jeanne, Sometimes writing helps get the sadness out. This is a beautiful poem, and I hope it does that for you. You'll be in my prayers too. Wishing you the best.